Waiting for the Morning: A Mother and Daughter's Journey Through Alzheimer's Disease by Brenda Parris Sibley

Review by Mary B. Walsh, Author
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I was probably among the first visitors to Brenda Parris Sibley's web site, "A Year to Remember...with My Mother and Alzheimer's Disease," back in 1996. I had a special interest in Alzheimer's, because our family had just come through our own caregiving journey. Our grandmother, who we cared for in our home for seven years, had died in May of '96 a little over a month after Brenda's mother passed away. I visited her site many, many times over the next few years. I thought it was wonderful!

I have just finished reading "Waiting for the Morning" and it has touched me in a way I honestly did not think it could. As far as caring for an Alzheimer's victim, I've experienced it all. All the emotions; the guilt of not being patient enough, the longing to bring this person back, for just a little longer, that feeling of being "in control" one day, and in the depths the next, not knowing how I would survive another minute. Yet, while reading Brenda's journal I found myself snickering, remembering the silly moments, and holding back tears recalling the heartache. I was right there in that little house with her, loving her Mom and feeling the emotion of every stage of this cruel disease. For some reason it was a good feeling. Maybe like surviving a battle and feeling camaraderie with a fellow soldier. How I would have loved to read this book while I was caring for "Gram!"

Brenda is learning as she goes along, trying different things to make her Mom comfortable, recording it all in her journal. She shares information she has read, and tries to figure out the things that seem to cause her mother's agitation so she can avoid them. It is very informative, and I believe would be a very comforting support to any caregiver.

Just to see that what they are experiencing with their loved one, although so very difficult, is not unusual and that the resulting emotions they feel are normal as well. But I now realize-even more than before- that Brenda and I were "in the trenches" at the very same time, learning and failing; but coming through it with stories that will hopefully make the way just a little more comforting to those going through it now.

....And the poetry! Brenda's poetry is so wonderfully honest and touching. I am filling up with tears just thinking about it. It is really special.

It was very moving to read of Brenda's grief, and how she worked through it. Isn't it amazing that this very difficult and life changing experience has resulted in the development of the website that many would consider the "hub" of all the Alzheimer's caregiving sites?

What a wonderful memorial to her Mom, and a victorious overcoming of such a difficult experience. Thank you Brenda for all of your efforts!

Mary B. Walsh is the author of “One Family’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s.” Mary and her husband moved to Pennsylvania to care for his grandmother. After they moved there, his grandmother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease. Her book shows that despite a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s Disease, the rest of the world does not stop. She tells her own story with love, humor, and compassion. Read an excerpt from her book at http://www.ec-online.net/Knowledge/Excerpts/walshexcerpt.html

About the Author

Brenda Parris Sibley is the creator of the award winning website "A Year to Remember." The book brings together her caregiving journal, and cherished photographs from family albums through the years. Waiting for the Morning, the title which comes from one of her poems, is a memorial to Jessie Lee Parris, a victim of Alzheimer's, and provides helpful information for coping with caregiving, including a bibliography of suggested books for both adults and children, and a webliography of recommended websites by organizations, professionals, caregivers, and early-onset Alzheimer's patients.

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Available from ElderCare Online™             www.ec-online.net             ©2002 Mary B. Walsh