Chapter 5: Going Home

Adjusting to the Change

Going home to the old home or a new one is a big adjustment. For the stroke survivor, it may be hard to transfer the skills learned during rehabilitation to a new location. Also, more problems caused by the stroke may appear as the person tries to go back to old activities. During this time, the stroke survivor and family learn how the stroke will affect daily life and can make the necessary adjustments.

These adjustments are a physical and emotional challenge for the main caregiver as well as the stroke survivor. The caregiver has many new responsibilities and may not have time for some favorite activities. The caregiver needs support, understanding, and some time to rest. Caregiving that falls too heavily on one person can be very stressful. Even when family members and friends are nearby and willing to help, conflicts over caregiving can cause stress.

A stroke is always stressful for the family, but it is especially hard if one family member is the only caregiver. Much time may be required to meet the needs of the stroke survivor. Therefore, the caregiver needs as much support as possible from others. Working together eases the stress on everyone.

Tips for Reducing Stress

The following tips for reducing stress are for both caregivers and stroke survivors.
     ·          Take stroke recovery and caregiving one day at a time and be hopeful.
     ·          Remember that adjusting to the effects of stroke takes time. Appreciate each small gain as you discover better ways of doing things.
     ·          Caregiving is learned. Expect that knowledge and skills will grow with experience.
     ·          Experiment. Until you find what works for you, try new ways of doing activities of daily living, communicating with each other, scheduling the day, and organizing your social life.
     ·          Plan for "breaks" or “respite” so that you are not together all the time. This is a good way for family and friends to help on occasion. You can also plan activities that get both of you out of the house.
     ·          Ask family members and friends to help in specific ways and commit to certain times to help. This gives others a chance to help in useful ways.
     ·          Read about the experiences of other people in similar situations. Your public library has life stories by people who have had a stroke as well as books for caregivers.
     ·          Join or start a support group for stroke survivors or caregivers. You can work on problems together and develop new friendships.
     ·          The Internet is a great way to connect with other caregivers. Visit the Caregiver Support Network on ElderCare Online for directories of support groups and volunteer mentors who can help you get started as a caregiver at http://www.ec-online.net/Community/Activists/can.htm
     ·          Be kind to each other. If you sometimes feel irritated, this is natural and you don't need to blame yourself. But don't "take it out" on the other person. It often helps to talk about these feelings with a friend, rehabilitation professional, or support group.
     ·          Plan and enjoy new experiences and don't look back. Avoid comparing life as it is now with how it was before the stroke.

Follow-up Appointments

After a stroke survivor returns to the community, regular follow-up appointments are usually scheduled with the doctor and sometimes with rehabilitation professionals. The purpose of follow-up is to check on the stroke survivor's medical condition and ability to use the skills learned in rehabilitation. It is also important to check on how well the stroke survivor and family are adjusting. The stroke survivor and caregiver can be prepared for these visits with a list of questions or concerns.

Continue to Chapter 6: Where to Go for Help ...